


I'm Tired of Feelin' Like Shit, And I Done Quit

by Snapp



Series: Adventures of Fox the Tooka [5]
Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Dogma (Star Wars) Deserved Better, Dogma (Star Wars) Lives, Gen, I Can't Tag Today Sorry, Papa Fox, Repost Of An Older Fic, Yes You Have Seen This Before
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:47:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27459703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snapp/pseuds/Snapp
Summary: You're probably thinking, haven't I seen this before?You have, I'm restructuring to make the storyline of Love Runs Out more cohesive, because instead of one shots it became an actual story, and this didn't really fit. So this is now just an extra drabble in the series. But for those of you who haven't read this, it's basically some Dogma/Fox bonding, I like their relationship, platonic or romantic (here it's platonic)Enjoy
Relationships: Dogma & CC-1010 | Fox, Dogma/Hound (Star Wars)
Series: Adventures of Fox the Tooka [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1895851
Comments: 2
Kudos: 18





	I'm Tired of Feelin' Like Shit, And I Done Quit

**Author's Note:**

> Note: I have several hc regarding Dogma, so here they are:  
> \- I hc as Dogma as a spectrum character. I am not on the spectrum, I am not going to say or argue that I can or posses the proper personal experience or complete knowledge. I did some research using what I believe are credible sources. I did wanted to make Dogma as realistic as possible, but I wanted to make him functional as well, so I chose not to highlight some of things that pertain to it that he does, as I believe he would view them as normal, so he won't think twice about them. I did what I could for his POV, and if someone with better research or experience, please hmu in the comments and tell me what I need to or should change and I'll do my best to fix it.  
> \- I also vibe with the Kaminoans doing some organ harvesting post Umbara, I think that they previously reconditioned him before Umbara, and they don't recondition twice.
> 
> This is set before my adventures of Fox the Tooka au.

Dogma pressed himself further into the thin mattress, fear running down his spine as he curled in on himself further, trying desperately to starve off tears. He tensed further as he felt a hand on his back, he immediately recognized the source and leaned back into it,

“Commander Fox,” he whispered as the commander moved to sit in front of him, tapping his shoulder twice. _Can I touch you?_

Dogma nodded, looking at Fox above his knees, the Commander was looking at him, not with pity or annoyance, he saw understanding and compassion and he wanted to sob further, _I don’t deserve...this_

Fox slowly moved, reaching to put his hand on Dogma’s knee, which Dogma lowered at the silent order. Fox, slowly pulled him into a hug, pressing his head into his shoulder. He just melted, the buzzing in his skin calming minutely, he could feel tears running down his face. 

“It’s okay,” Fox soothed, tightening his arms around his shoulders, moving him so they were pressed chest to chest, Dogma clung to Fox, sobbing softly. He didn’t even know _why_ he was crying. _Yes you do, because you don’t deserve this, you’re weak, a traitor, you can’t even function correctly, it’s a miracle you survived Kamino, pure chance that Commander Fox took you in._

“Stop that,” Fox whispered into his ear, breaking Dogma out of his thoughts, “you’re thinking too loud.”

“Sorry sir,” Dogma apologized, feeling the slow buzzing return, _oh gods, what if I annoy him and he leaves me and I’ll go back to being a glorified science experiment._

“Don’t kid, you’re one of us, and I don’t leave my brothers behind,” Fox declared softly.

Dogma just took a few shaky breathes, too keyed up to argue.

“Come on,” Dogma had a moment of confusion before Fox stood up, Dogma clung to him, not wanting to lose the contact he had been craving, “let’s go out, sitting here won’t do you any good.”

“Okay sir,”

“Fox,”

“Sorry si- Fox,” 

Fox gave him a loose smile and helped him up, moving to their lockers, “I’ll update Thorn and let him know you and I will be taking this patrol, I think Hound might thank you for the extra sleep, and Thorn will be grateful that he doesn’t have to wake Hound up.”

Dogma flushed slightly at the mention of Hound, if Fox noticed he didn’t say anything, at least at the moment.

He quickly and meticulously put on his armor, the former blue and white plastoid had been replaced with red and gray paint, an added kama and single palduran, a sign of new changes.

While his armour didn’t have any new or special markings, his kama did. It is based on the triangle design that had been on his bucket. A simple: _take a shot with your gut or take the fall with a heavy heart_ , had been stitched into it. 

“Sergeant.” Dogma turned from fiddling with his kama to see Fox standing at the doorway, smiling.

“Sir.” Dogma saluted quickly, and they both walked out, “are we taking speeders or…”

“We’re running this,” Fox smiled breathlessly, clearly excited.

The two broke off into a run, climbing up a drainage pipe while Fox used window sills. Dogma felt everything loosen as he ran alongside Commander Fox, enjoying the frigid blue sky that purpled the bright red of their armour. For a while, they just enjoyed the climb and Dogma was tempted to take off his helmet.

“So…” _Oh gods, no, it’s the teasing buir voice_ , “Hound?”

_Play dumb,_

“Who’s Hound?” 

_Not that dumb._

“Kiddo, we need to discuss lying,” Fox chuckled, “and how to manage your romantic feelings.”

“I don’t have romantic feelings towards Hound,” Dogma flushed.

“Mhmm,” Fox nodded, “that’s not what I see.”

“I-” 

“And the looks that Hound gives you...” 

“I-what?” Dogma stopped, nearly tripping over a ledge.

Fox laughed, “I think he _likes_ you.”

“Please stop Commander,” Dogma begged. _He likes me?_ He internally screamed, _is this a joke?_

“This is not a joke, it’s just what I am seeing,” Fox responded coolly.

“Please sir, I’m begging you,” Dogma pleaded.

Fox barked a cackle and Dogma couldn’t help return it with a small snort. The two had to stop, they were laughing so hard. 

Dogma slumped down on a rooftop, removing his bucket. Fox did the same, laying eagle-spread on the cement. 

“Thank you,” Dogma whispered, and Fox sat up again, and scooted to sit near him, not close enough to make him feel uncomfortable but enough to know that he was there and to offer support.

Dogma didn’t know what he had done in whatever past life he called his to deserve this. Krell had stripped him of what he was, what he believed in. The Kaminii then finished whatever the traitor had missed, thorough blades cutting through skin _oh god’s why_.

“You're not alone,” Fox whispered and Dogma was broken from his thoughts.

“What?” 

“I'm your boat kiddo,” Fox repeated slowly and at Dogma's look he tapped his wrist four times and Dogma nodded, “I was the lonely, the strange vod. The one everyone avoided, avoids. I am an outcast, designed to repeat orders and rules until my voice goes out. I was the singled out, always in trouble because my brothers were being stupid, so I resolved to be better, follow rules and orders so that wouldn’t be me, so I could protect my vode no matter what.”

“And what good did that do me, I’m alone now. Tup is gone, I’ll never see him again if I want to stay alive, Huff, Oliver and ‘63 are dead, I don’t have anyone left, Hardcase is dead for all I know, I had Jesse and Fives executed-”

“Attempted execution,” Fox corrected, but had the courtesy to look abashed at Dogma’s pointed look.

“Kix and Rex would never forgive me, and I certainly wouldn’t want them to, gods know I haven’t.” Dogma murmured, his nails burning his scalp.

“If you could go back, would you do it again?” Fox asked.

“Of course not!” Dogma whipped his head to look at Fox, hoping to convey his anger and honesty.

“Then why do you still blame yourself?” 

“Cause it’s my fault,”

“You said if you had the option to go back you wouldn’t make any repeats,” 

“Doesn’t make it any less my fault,” Dogma huffed angrily, balling his fists.

Fox sighed, pressing his hand into Dogma’s hair. Dogma was unable to resist the desire to press into the hand.

“You acknowledge what happened, how you went wrong, what you should’ve done, have worked to change yourself and have regrets,” Dogma sniffed as Fox scratched his head, mussing his slicked hair, “while you might have been unwillingly involved, you have regrets and you’ve gone so far, why let it haunt you?”

“Because it’s what I deserve,” Dogma shut his eyes, “I deserved what happened on Kamino, I deserve to be hated, and I deserve to be exiled.”

“I know what that’s like,” Fox sympathized quietly, “I know.”

Dogma shuffled into Fox, Fox wrapped his arms around him and Dogma almost broke down further.

“Sir?” 

“I am an outcast, my own batchmates are either dead or no longer want anything to do with me,” Fox whispered, “they talk about me like I’m not there, they spit my name and bash my place. But I have done things, things that do warrant such a reaction, I don’t regret them.”

“Does it ever get easier?”

“No,” Fox pressed his chin on Dogma’s head.

“Then how do you cope?”

“Copious amounts of alcohol and enough stims to kill a small rankorr,” Fox responded without missing a beat, his gaze softening, “but, I have Thorn, Thire and Stone and I had Ponds. All you have to do is reach out, Hound will probably be over himself to talk to you, Cardinal and Talon are your squadmates, and they’ll have your back, and I will always be in your corner.”

“Cardinal, yeah.”

“Cardinal...is well...Cardinal,” Fox agreed, “he’s an ass, but he’s not too bad once you get to know him.” 

“I’ve known him for two months and I can tell you that's not true,”

“Hmm, well I’ve known him for years and I can confirm, he shows how likes people by being an asshole,”

“Heh, I know how that is,” Dogma whispered.

“Kid, it sucks, the feeling that no matter what you do or try everyone will always hate you, and I know I’m not the one you want forgiveness from,” Fox slowly pulled Dogma up, “but, who you were is past, maybe one day you’ll march on with Huff, Oliver and ‘63, maybe see Tup or wait to march beside him, and do you really want to say that you wasted your time pondering old regrets and losing yourself to painful memories?”

“No,” Dogma whispered, “I don’t.”

“You are a good man, one of the best damn men I’ve had under me, my nat-born staff adore you, as do the shinies and younglings that we come across, to reduce yourself to Umbara is doing nothing but holding you back.” Fox separated, whipping a tear from Dogma’s cheek, 

“I can’t promise total improvement, I can’t promise that the 501st forgives you, and I can’t promise you’ll ever see, what was his name, Tupperware?”

“Tup,” Dogma smiled, “we used to steal tupperware containers and fill his locker with them, he found it hilarious.”

“When Ponds was younger, a frog somehow found its way in our path during one of our off planet training missions, the poor bastard tripped and fell into a small pond, Wolffe nearly fell with him, we were laughing so hard. We used to call him Froggo before Jango ‘the good time ruiner’ Fett told us off.

“You guys called Prime: Jango ‘the good time ruiner’ Fett?”

“Not to his face of course,” Fox laughed, ruffling Dogma’s hair, smiling at the strands that fell into his face, “we had _plenty_ of names for Prime.”

Dogma snorted and they both dissolved into laughter for a while before falling silent.

“I do believe we have a patrol to finish,”

“Yes sir,” Dogma smiled at Fox’s look and grabbed his bucket, shoving it on his head as Fox did the same.

“Have you ever played tag?”

“Yeah, as a cadet,” Dogma said confusedly.

“Have you ever done it while on extremely tall buildings and oncoming traffic?”

“No sir, but it sounds like a it would be worth the resulting visit to a very angry Screecher,”

“Indeed,”

“So, who's it?” 

“Well,” Fox started before reaching out to Dogma, who didn’t dodge in time, “it seems you are Dogm’ika.”

Fox tipped over the side and Dogma quickly followed, enjoying the feeling of weightlessness and simultaneously being weighed down that only Coruscant to give.

**Author's Note:**

> Title from How About Now by Grandson


End file.
